Lez Say More Podcast
Welcome to Lez Say More: the podcast where your favorite duo of best friends—together for over 20 years—gets real about the queer community. Join us every Wednesday as we dive into everything from health and wellness, to fashion, relationships, sex - and even the occasional celebrity gossip. With our trademark humor and brutal honesty, we’re here to share stories, laughs, and insights about the (queer) modern life and all the fabulousness it has to offer. Whether you're part of the community or just curious, grab your favorite drink and join the conversation—because we promise to keep it funny, relatable, and absolutely unfiltered!
Lez Say More Podcast
Cougars, Pumas and Botox dates, oh my!
Ever had a beauty mishap right before a major event? Ava sure did, with an eyebrow lift incident just days before her wedding! In our latest episode, we—Solange and Ava—share some hilarious Botox tales and candidly discuss our self-care rituals. We’re not afraid to laugh at ourselves while highlighting the importance of choosing the right skincare routines that match our personalities and bodies.
Fashion lovers, tune in as we chat about how Love Island has influenced our clothing choices, especially during those scorching California summers. We navigate the sometimes tricky waters of dressing for diverse body types while staying true to our style. From polo shirts to exploring new fashion territories, we’ve come a long way—and we're all about letting individuals express themselves, especially when it comes to big events like weddings!
Age is just a number, right? We tackle this common perception as we explore relationships with age differences. From weight loss boosting our fashion confidence to the humorous labels like "cougar" and "puma," we’re all about embracing what makes us feel good. We share our thoughts on how age impacts relationship dynamics and how those differences often fade over time, leaving room for maturity and shared experiences. Join us for a light-hearted yet insightful conversation on style, self-care, and the age-old topic of love across generations.
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Okay, so now that we've established who the Cougars are and who the Pumas are although I wish there was like another name and it wasn't like Puma, like couldn't it be Cheetahs?
Speaker 2:I have a feeling a Cheetah is something we don't even know. I haven't found any either I just.
Speaker 1:I just want to look cool.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think it's more about like finding what fits your body.
Speaker 1:Yeah yeah, and what you feel comfortable in and also what speaks to your personality we need to get her ass in here so she could tell us if she liked it or not yeah, she's definitely going to be a guest because she has some really good, impeccable taste.
Speaker 2:She's also got some wild stories that we're going to make her tell us, because she's a little bit she's a little bit more on the reserved side. Hey guys, welcome back to the let's Say More podcast. I am Solange, I'm Ava. Today we are going to be chatting a little bit about self-care, fashion style, lesbian stereotypes, dating cougars or pumas, you know. Dating outside of our age ranges. Are you a cougar or a puma? You're a cougar or a puma. I'm a cougar. I'm a puma. You're a puma.
Speaker 1:I hate those shoes, but I guess I'm a puma.
Speaker 2:That's a good idea. I'm going to get you those.
Speaker 1:No, no, no, as a gift. No, I will re-gift them to you they're coming back in style what's oh?
Speaker 2:now see, we're gonna be talking about style. That's a good segue. I'm good, all right. So we recently, talking about self-care, went on a botox date, not a coffee date, but a botox date yeah, botox, date, so la it is so it really is. We went and got our refreshers.
Speaker 1:I can't even move my forehead.
Speaker 2:You can't move your forehead. This is Ava's second time getting a little Botox. Her first time was quite comical. You want to tell them?
Speaker 1:Boo yeah, because it was for the wedding and I didn't know what an eyebrow lift was and I just I didn't know. And I remember sitting at home and I was about to FaceTime you because I looked at myself and I looked like that character, that cartoon character where her eyebrows are like drawn on but like really high. And I was like I'm not about to get married like this and I was freaking out and I sent you a whole video about it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because you're not supposed to do your touch ups until like two weeks after your initial appointment and you were like I think like a day or two shy from that and you were leaving, I think like what, that same weekend, yes, and it was, and it was like a Thursday. I think that you sent it to me, or something like that. I was dying laughing. If I, if I find that video, I'm going to have to share it on Instagram.
Speaker 1:You could share it with them For the booze to see. Yeah, and I had to go and I was like I need you to drop it and I didn't know what I was talking about.
Speaker 2:I was like you have to go and just tell her to drop them. She's like what?
Speaker 1:Yeah? And then she just like, did a little, just a little ping, and then it dropped and I was like, oh shit, okay, this is pretty cool. And then, yeah, I liked how it smoothed everything out.
Speaker 2:I really liked it. It's kind of funny because I'm very much like into health and wellness and that kind of stuff and being very adamant about what I put into my body. To an extent I'm not like crazy neurotic about it.
Speaker 1:I mean because we are putting toxins in our body, right but that's.
Speaker 2:That's where I I guess I would say that's where I draw the line.
Speaker 1:Like I'm. That's like saying like pick your poison. So that's the poison I'm picking the Botox, the poison, that is the poison I'm picking.
Speaker 2:Botox is my poison, so I'm good. Everywhere else, yeah. And then the Botox is where I, like you know, splurge a little.
Speaker 1:It's the 80-20 rule.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and it's not even that much. I mean, I just get a little bit on the forehead. You'll notice in our previous videos much more wrinkly than I am today.
Speaker 1:They'll be like dang.
Speaker 2:What happened to them?
Speaker 1:We sound better. You know, you look better. We're like dang. They're not shy anymore. Ava finally opened up, not like a fucking clam that all of you were complaining about. Here we are.
Speaker 2:Well, they haven't heard our sex episodes yet. Talk about opening up.
Speaker 1:Oh, that could be taken in a lot of different ways, exactly.
Speaker 2:All right. So talking about self-care, boo, what's your self-care routine?
Speaker 1:Well, I a few years ago started to get facials from this. My wonderful facialist and I had Fernanda's friend actually referred me to her Shout out to Lorenza for that one and I go every eight weeks and then I have rosacea. So she has me on like a certain regimen skincare routine with a line that specializes in rosacea. It's something I think it's never going to go away for me. It's just keeping it under control. But yeah, I do all that. Morning I have my morning routine and then at night I have my night routine and try to keep the skin as hydrated as possible A lot of water, a lot of water.
Speaker 2:I don't drink enough.
Speaker 1:A lot of water. So I learned that the hard way because when you go get a facial they like to extract your skin.
Speaker 2:Yeah See, I like to extract, I don't like to oh, you like to extract, I don't like it when oh, you like to. Oh, I love that pimple popping shit.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So if your face is really dry, then it hurts or she just can't do it. So I have a little contest with myself to see how hard I can make it for her as far as Finding something. Finding something now. So now my skin is very hydrated, but she gets frustrated because there's not a lot to pop anymore.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think that has a lot to do with eating habits, and I've started to take creatine. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, me too, and creatine has really done wonders for my face. I know a lot of women have that whole stereotype that creatine is only for men, but it actually is a great supplement for women.
Speaker 2:I agree, I've noticed a huge difference in my body, like I haven't been working out as much as I probably should be. I'm getting back into it, but I noticed a huge difference when I started taking the creatine. She's flexing her muscles over here, no. I started taking creatine and I noticed a huge difference when I started lifting, that I was gaining muscle much faster than prior to. So creatine is huge. It's huge. It's really good for you. It's the most studied supplement ever. So I started taking creatine. I noticed a huge difference in my muscles, but then I started to notice a difference in my cognitive health too, which is great, because as we're getting older I guess I don't really have that excuse, though, because I've always had memory problems but as you start getting older, your memory starts to go Well.
Speaker 1:I like to call it a selective memory, because some things you know you have to act like you don't really remember. No, but it is good, especially when you have a wife. She's going to kill you for that one. No, babe, I remember everything. But don't you worry, I remember it all. No, but I mean creatine, I think is great. I'm not going to plug the supplement that I use because people should use whatever, no, you should find your own.
Speaker 2:And until we start getting paid, we're not plugging anything, we're not plugging anything If you want to pay us then we'll plug Only products that we believe in, though. Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 1:I mean for a little change. I might do some strange things.
Speaker 2:I'm kidding, I'm joking. What's your self-care routine? My self-care routine is actually surprisingly pretty simple. I don't really have too much. I really need to get better about my skincare routine as far as being more adamant about it.
Speaker 2:Like, I wash my face every morning, usually after I work out, but I have a hard time doing a skincare routine at night. So, like all, if I put anything on I'll take it off, you know. But I don't necessarily go into like night creams and retinols and all this stuff. So I recently started doing that and I've recently noticed, now that I'm getting older, like I turned 40. And I literally noticed the difference overnight. It is insane.
Speaker 2:I looked in the mirror and I was like, oh my God, what is that and what is that and what happened here and where did all my collagen go? So I have started getting a little bit more into doing more of like resurfacing and I want to look into doing more. I'm really into like the natural stuff, so like the PRF, which is your own plasma, for those that don't know and it goes in and it pretty much stimulates collagen. So that is something that I'm really into doing and I kind of want to maybe dabble in Sculptra, which is something else, that kind of regenerates collagen. But all of these things are more on the natural side. I don't. I'm not really into the fillers and that kind of thing. I don't want to change the shape of my face and I don't want to look all weird when I'm older and look like a cat lady.
Speaker 1:Oh that's just not my jam.
Speaker 2:Yeah. No no, I don't. That's like my biggest fear. You know, looking good for my age is my goal. Also, I feel like it's a little bit of a of a, I don't want to say it's not as common in the lesbian community. I've noticed for women to kind of take care of themselves as well. I've noticed the same.
Speaker 1:You know how I go down that weird algorithm in Instagram and I send you this weird stuff. Yeah, she sends me some fucking weird shit. It is, but I mean, I need to laugh with someone about it. So then there are these women where I'm like oh, I don't want to go that route, I don't want to, I don't want to go that route.
Speaker 2:My opinion is that I think that, because they are a lot, of, these women that we're talking about tend to be a little bit more on the masculine side. No-transcript really needing to put the effort into yourself.
Speaker 1:Why do you think like cause? We assume men don't put the effort.
Speaker 2:I think that's what it might be, or or they think that it's too feminine or I don't know. I mean, I can speak for myself. I used to be way more masculine than I am now. I felt like there were things that I was like willing to do and willing to try, and then things that I was like no, that's too girly, I'm not doing that. Like SPF definitely something I think general population would do, washing your face, putting on some moisturizer, but anything aside, like anything added to that, just always felt like it was like a really girly thing to do for me.
Speaker 2:Oh okay, you know like it was like oh, all right, well, I don't know if I'm gonna go go get facials, or I don't know if I'm going to go do this. And now that I've gotten older and I've matured and I've become more in touch with my feminine side, I'm like hell, yeah, I'm going to go get a facial, I'm going to go do laser, I'm going to do some Botox, I'm going to do some Sculptra or PRF or PRP or whatever microneedling, anything that's gonna keep the skin looking young and refreshed.
Speaker 1:No, I'll do the facials, I'll do the Botox once in a while. My mom has really good skin, but I think that's because she doesn't. She never drank or anything, so I feel like that's what she does. You know, one routine I wish I could do or get into is the Gua Sha.
Speaker 2:Oh I do that.
Speaker 1:I do that too. I want to get into that. I know it's really good. I have so many of them at home. Ferns bought me some, I bought myself some.
Speaker 2:I just haven't done it. I went to. So the day of my birthday party, I went to this place called Face Gym in West Hollywood.
Speaker 1:I've heard of this place oh my God, I've heard of it.
Speaker 2:My face looks so snatched, it was crazy they snatch it.
Speaker 1:They snatch. And how long do you stay snatched for, though?
Speaker 2:it lasts about a week or so. About a week, I mean. Basically what they do is they do like an intense, like massage of your face and they drain, you know they drain all the fluid out of your face so then your face isn't as puffy, yeah. And then she did this like CO2. I think it was like a CO2. Like oxygen, but it was like really cold, oh okay, and it gives you kind of that glass face. Look, I loved it.
Speaker 1:I don't want a glass face.
Speaker 2:Oh my God it was amazing, but I have really dry skin so for me it helps so much with the moisture and kind of like making my skin look a little bit more refreshed I guess I would say, okay, yeah, if I did a glass face, then you wouldn't laugh at all my facial expressions.
Speaker 1:I give you all the time no, it's not glass face like you're frozen.
Speaker 2:Well then it's glass face like you're, like your skin. You haven't seen, never mind I. I'm not even going to go into it.
Speaker 1:Well, send it to me. Change my algorithm on Instagram please.
Speaker 2:Oh man, so Boo. Let me ask you what.
Speaker 1:How did you find your style? I don't know if I want to share the story on how I found it, but I guess I have to be open, right, I had a really hard time trying to figure it out because, you know, growing up there weren't people I looked up to, that were women that I was like oh, I like what they're wearing, because they didn't dress like me. I was very like tomboyish my whole life and then when you're dating someone, you want to impress them.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So that was kind of difficult too. Like I just felt like I was wearing the same thing all the time and I was getting tired. Difficult too. Like I just felt like I was wearing the same thing all the time and I I was getting tired of it. So I remember going like on Pinterest and I put in like tomboy attire, and it comes up with like suits, like girls in like dress shirts tucked into, like slacks and stuff and I'm like I'm.
Speaker 1:I'm not doing that. You're like I don't work in an office and my boobs are too big, like it's just awkward. I'm not doing. I'm not doing that. You're like I don't work in an office and my boobs are too big, like it's just awkward. I'm not doing that. So then I. It wasn't until I started watching Love Island.
Speaker 2:Oh my God you on this fucking Love Island.
Speaker 1:Listen, it has so many purposes, so many. Just, you should try it. I saw the guys on there and their outfits. I was like dang, like I like that shirt, Like I really liked how they dressed. It was really clean, Isn't it?
Speaker 2:like island wear? Aren't they always on an?
Speaker 1:island. So during the day they're in swimsuits and then at night, when they're having like they're in nighttime island clothes.
Speaker 1:Well, yeah, but like nice attire and they're like they can only have like one alcoholic beverage. They all meet out outside and they all dress up. The girls all do their makeup, put on their fake eyelashes, their caterpillars and they're you know, fix up their wigs and they go outside and the men are just like I don't know. They just put on their like best island attire and I just really liked it. I mean we're in Cali, so it's like the summers are hot. The really liked it. I mean we're in Cali, so it's like the summers are hot. You know, the winters are easy because you could just throw a hoodie on, like that's easy for me, but it's like during the summer I never knew what to wear.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I think that's kind of for everyone anywhere, like I feel like summer fashion is never good, it's always pretty simple.
Speaker 1:If you're a skinny girl, you can put on a freaking t-shirt, tank top, shorts, some sandals and you're good to go. But when you got some extra weight on you, it's different.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. I mean you have to either layer or you have to be strategic with the way clothes fit Right.
Speaker 1:So you have to, you know, and you over, and you overthink it too. I overthink it and I also want to keep my wife or, at the time, my girlfriend, you know happy, because I wanted her to look at me and be like oh, you look cute or you look, you look nice. And Fern's not the easiest to get a compliment from.
Speaker 2:Like the way she saw it not the easiest to get a compliment from. Like the way she saw, thought of you and complimented you when she saw you in a hat.
Speaker 1:Oh yes, jesus, you're gonna make my rosacea come out. She was like hey all right she told me I could holler at her. Oh, all right, say less, say.
Speaker 2:I have to like, talk like that too, you know like oh, say less, what's up girl, the hey mamas. The hey mamas. Oh God, that is not a fashion I'm into, no it's not.
Speaker 1:So yeah, Love Island is my inspiration.
Speaker 2:So okay. So if you had to describe your style, how would you describe it?
Speaker 1:I don't know, just I don't know Tomboyish, I don't know, I don't know tomboyish, I don't know, I don't see, I don't know the label for it if I?
Speaker 2:I mean I definitely noticed that you've made a change, because abba had a thing with polo shirts. I did like she was obsessed with the polo shirt because I think even your wife had said god solely. Please help her get out of these polo shirts yeah, I love them, love them.
Speaker 2:And I was like that's her thing, like we all have a signature thing. But I get it. I understand you want her to like explore outside of the polo shirt, yeah, like there are a lot of lesbians that kind of just stick to the button downs and that's what they wear, and that's what they do. I'm not hating, I'm just saying there are other things you can wear.
Speaker 1:Not hating, I'm just saying there are other things you can wear, yeah, so I had to, like I had to get out of my comfort zone. The polos are still there, don't get it twisted. They are. I just don't.
Speaker 2:I don't wear them as often anymore, so have you noticed that you tend to look more for inspiration in the male genre of fashion versus female?
Speaker 1:Yeah, because I don't. Really I haven't found like a female that I am like. Oh, I like their style, because a lot of the women that I do like their style. Their body type isn't like mine at all, Not to say like a man's is because obviously a man's body they don't have boobs, yeah, or a big butt like you do. Listen, I got some cake back there, you sure do See what I mean.
Speaker 1:See, I thought I was going to have a good comeback. I didn't, nope, but no, I like the way you know their style is. I feel like I tend to obviously find it's more relatable for me. For others it could be different. I know lesbians that are more on the tomboy side, but they can pull off the feminine look and the masculine look. I don't believe I can really pull off the feminine look. I just feel like when I do dress up like that, I feel weird in it.
Speaker 2:Well, because it's not, you're not comfortable, it's not like who you are, yeah, like for your wedding.
Speaker 1:I think that I was comfortable because it was like you had. You had been like slacks and like a blouse, and that that's comfortable for me. But if you had been like a dress, I think I'd be uncomfortable, although I do it for you.
Speaker 2:But it just I would never have you in a dress. I'm an avid believer Like if you let people wear whatever they want to wear, they're going to look their best and they're going to feel their best and they're going to have the best time. That's why, like, if I ever got married again, I would do the same thing. I'd be like everybody just wear whatever the hell you want to wear, but stay in this color palette. Yeah, that makes sense color palette.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 2:You know, I think you did the same thing for us for your wedding, like I wanted you guys to be comfortable, especially you know, you and Priscilla.
Speaker 1:I wanted you guys to be the most to be comfortable because it's easy for for the dresses yeah, they could find a dress, but it's it's harder for women to find like a suit and I think you and Priscilla, you know, pulled it off. And we, you know, pulled it off and we looked like we were getting married. People were like people did you guys getting married?
Speaker 2:we're like no, no, I had people commenting thinking the two of you were getting married. I know I was like, no, wasn't their day. Typical lesbians in suits with bouquets? Yeah, we totally that picture for sure looked like we were getting. Yeah, it did, it did. It was pretty funny. Is there an article of clothing or fashion that you are obsessed with? My shoes, I knew it.
Speaker 1:I love them, all of them, I know.
Speaker 2:You're a sneakerhead. How many pairs of shoes do you have?
Speaker 1:I don't know, but they're not all at my house, they're at my mom's too. Okay, if you had to guesstimate.
Speaker 2:Five, five 500?.
Speaker 1:No, priscilla has like 500.
Speaker 2:No way, I know. P has some good style too, though Priscilla has.
Speaker 1:P has some impeccable style and taste when it comes to like she's always had it, I think Priscilla, from the day I can remember to now. Her style has always been great and everyone's always complimented her style.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she always knows and she has like the perfect little body to kind of dress like even even when she says she's been fluffy like I'm like girl, girl stop you'll still blow away in the wind.
Speaker 1:She's, and she's gone through different hairstyles. She's gone through but, but mostly long hair, yeah, but straight, but then like flat iron. Do you ever, did you ever see her with curly hair?
Speaker 2:I. I think when I first met her she had curly hair.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because her natural hair is curly, yeah, and then I remember when she chopped it all off.
Speaker 2:That was the best, I loved it and I was like, oh my God, you cut all your hair off. Yeah, she could rock it. I thought she looked great, but I think she I want to say she didn't like it.
Speaker 1:If I remember correctly, she may not have liked it at first, but I think she did. But you know what that reminds me? We need to get her ass in here so she could tell us if she liked it or not. Yeah, she's definitely going to be a guest because she has some really good, impeccable taste.
Speaker 2:She's also got some wild stories that we're going to make her tell us because she's a little bit more on the reserved side. So we're going to have to wild her up.
Speaker 1:We are Like wild her up, wind her up. No, I know, but wild, I don't see what I mean. You're making up your own shit. I am, you're like the hybrid people.
Speaker 2:We want to make her wild, so instead of wind her up, wild her up. Okay, we're going to talk about how we're going to do that after.
Speaker 2:We can't make it public, because then she'll know and she'll be expecting it, yeah, yeah, but she's got some good, she's got some good style she's also somebody who borders the line of feminine and masculine really well, because she can wear the femme stuff and she'll dress up femme sometimes and she looks incredible. And then there are times when most of the time I think she's more on the sportier side, yeah. But yeah, I definitely think she's, think she's someone to look up to for your fashion.
Speaker 2:I agree with you, and shoes and all that, she makes her own shoes, right yeah.
Speaker 1:She just got a really good eye, I think.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she has a really good eye.
Speaker 1:Definitely. But what would you call your style? How'd you get your style? Because, listen, I saw some pictures of you, oh dear God, that I have on a camera roll, and we went from-. Listen, we've all had no, your hairstyles. We went from the low ponytail, yeah. We went to the short hair, we went to the blonde tips, remember the blonde oh yeah, no, I had like a skunk on one side A skunk, a skunk, and then your fashion was like yeah. I remember these things Always different.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean okay. So my style is ever evolving. Yes, but that's good, though. When I was younger, I was definitely much more into basketball attire, so it was basketball shorts, T-shirts, baggy clothes, sports bras up until I was probably like sports bras with the baggy shorts.
Speaker 2:No, no, I, I, I was always, I was. I was a fluffier kid, so I had a lot of extra fluff on me that I had to cover up with big t-shirts and big sweaters. So, no, never just in a sports bra. So I basically transitioned, I guess I would say, into a different style of clothing. I feel like you always kind of change what you wear based on the crowd you hang out with.
Speaker 2:So, I went from being a big tomboy, very big, baggy clothes, also because I was really insecure with my body and I remember always wearing a sports bra because I had big boobs and I hated them. So I would try to like smash them down as much as I could say, probably about senior year or junior year in high school. Senior year in high school I started to become more comfortable in my sexuality so I started to explore more, but that's when I started to go through what I like to call my thug life.
Speaker 2:Oh, you were a thug, that's what I would wear, like you know, the Timberlands and the Iniche and Echo and all that good stuff, FUBU, fubu. All that good stuff that quickly transitioned into, like my skater phase, yes, I remember your skater phase, that's when I had the ponytail yes. So then I did the skater phase for a little while. That's when I was hanging out with Heather, because Heather kind of had that vibe too.
Speaker 1:Heather totally had that vibe.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I remember, didn't she have a tattoo that like? I think?
Speaker 2:Yeah, she got the. I think she still has it the star right With the checkered pattern inside.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Everybody had that star.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so she, she and I had similar style in that sense, like the dickies and the skater stuff um, did you guys know how to skate? I didn't. I think she might have okay, I don't know. I I didn't for sure I did not. So I knew how to rollerblade, but that's about it, girl. So I then transitioned more into, like, my emo phase. And when I transitioned more into the emo phase, that's when I had that funky hairstyle.
Speaker 1:I remember the vest you'd wear. Oh my God, I would wear vests all the time. Oh dear God, yeah you would.
Speaker 2:But yeah, it was the emo phase. It was kind of like a little bit of a grunge rock kind of look.
Speaker 1:And a mascara.
Speaker 2:But that's when I started to wear makeup. So that's when I started to get a little bit more comfortable in my femininity. That's when I started to wear a regular bra and I let go of the sports bra because I didn't want the uni boob. So I was like yeah, this uni boob thing is not cute.
Speaker 2:So I said I need a separation. So I started to like look for bras that were minimizers but also felt comfortable. And you know, and I found, I found the bra, the bra, the bra. Yeah, you referred the bra to me too, especially for big chested women. For those that want to know, just hit me up, I'll send you a link. So I transitioned basically into this more kind of punky style, but not punky, but like I guess I would say more, I would call it emo more emo style.
Speaker 2:I would wear makeup and all that and I was getting a little bit more into that kind of vibe and I always wore a ton of jewelry, ton of jewelry. Jewelry has always been my thing.
Speaker 1:I've always loved your jewelry that you've worn.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I've always been somebody who's worn a lot of jewelry, especially bracelets, Like I used. I mean, this is small but I used to have a much bigger stack. And now I would say I've embraced my femininity a lot more. But I'm still I like to call myself androgynous, Like I don't think that I am too masc, nor am I femme at all. I have this like fine line of unisex that I like. Like I shop some women's clothes. I shop some men's clothes, I think, because I have a very small lower body. I don't necessarily have hips or a butt, so for me it's easy to fit into, you know, women's pants and men's pants. Very similarly, the tops is where I struggle because I tend to be bigger chested, so I have a hard time. But now I've kind of embraced. Also, I've lost weight so I'm more comfortable in my skin. But I would say I'm more androgynous. Would say I'm more androgynous.
Speaker 2:I've had a hard time finding lesbians whom I admire. As far as fashion, like you know people that, like you, want to look up and see what styles they have, how to emulate their vibe I can't find anybody like I have found two people, one of which is actually a lesbian, whom I. I think she's a lesbian whom I like her style, but she's also real thin and can pull anything off. Who is it? The one from the Albert? No, no, no, no, no, this girl her name, I think, is like Tasia Von Ree, Von Ray.
Speaker 1:Von Ree something like that.
Speaker 2:She's an artist, photographer, painter, sculptor, whatever. But she has this really cool, unique style. She always wears like these hats and you know she's got this cool vibe. She's a cool girl. She's also super thin, so the things that she can wear I can't wear. I'm not skinny like that. She's like, you know, no boobs, no butt, no nothing. So I kind of take little bits and pieces from different people that I admire, but I guess recently my main inspo has been Jeremiah Brent that guy that.
Speaker 2:I told you about, but he's a gay guy. This is your boo.
Speaker 1:This is like your ultimate boo.
Speaker 2:He has the best style. And it's funny because we have a lot of similarities in the sense that, like we both, he both both love jewelry. He wears a ton of jewelry. In the sense that, like we both, he both both love jewelry, he wears a ton of jewelry. So I'm like, ok, I like that too. You know, he's got similar kind of hair styles. I mean, he's obviously a guy, so his hair is different.
Speaker 2:I found that that's been my my go to as far as, like looking for inspo, it's been between Tasia and Jeremiah.
Speaker 1:I haven't found any either. I just, I just want to look cool.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think it's. I think it's more about, like, finding what fits your body. Yeah yeah, and what you feel comfortable in, and also what speaks to your personality. So I think your new vibe totally speaks to your personality, what speaks to your personality? So I think your new vibe totally speaks to your personality.
Speaker 1:Thank you for appreciating the fact that I changed, because you and Fernanda ganged up on my polos.
Speaker 2:I mean I'm just saying the polos. I think it was time to retire some of those. They were. No, we had a good run.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we had a really good run. I had a lot of different colors in them and now you know here we are, and here we are now wearing different necklines, different necklines, because I lost a little bit of weight.
Speaker 2:So I feel like I could do it. Weight definitely plays into your fashion and how you feel, what you feel comfortable in the polos what it was doing for me.
Speaker 1:It was hiding, I think, how big I probably was. You know then and now that like I feel like I have a neck, I feel like I can wear, I could do things different and I honestly feel so much better in clothes than I did before and I take constructive criticism well when it's like delivered a certain way. Because I am sensitive, she's a cancer. I am Shout out to all my cancers, to all the sensitive cancers out there, but we feel baby, we feel you certainly do, we do.
Speaker 1:So I think that constructive criticism played a big role, because I did want Fernanda to again to like feel good being next to me and vice versa.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you got to look good for your puma. I mean, you're a cougar, she's a cougar, you're the puma.
Speaker 1:Are you sure there's not another word for it? Like I have to be a puma.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you're the puma, hold on, hold on. Yes, you are the puma because you are dating somebody who is younger than you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, a cougar dates no oh you had it wrong, I had it wrong, so I'm the cougar You're the cougar, I'm the cougar, you're the cougar, she's the puma, so you're dating.
Speaker 2:She is dating somebody who is older than her, yeah, who is older than her, yeah, so she's going for the cougars.
Speaker 1:Oh, you said it plural, so she's going for more than one.
Speaker 2:No, but I mean, like she's going for the cougar, meaning you, you're going for the pumas, meaning her. Yeah, she pounced on me, she pounced on you. Is this the first girl you've ever? Well, now married but dated who was younger than you? Yes, okay, well, now married but dated who was younger than you? Yes, okay, what's what's?
Speaker 1:the age difference. I don't want to. There's no number. Age is nothing but a number. I don't want to. I don't like to talk about it, but there's an age difference there but why don't you like to talk about it?
Speaker 2:is there a sensitive uh subject? Is there an insecurity about it?
Speaker 1:yeah, because it makes me feel weird that like Men do it all the time. Yeah, I don't know, but I just I don't like how it makes. It doesn't make me feel like. I don't feel like I accomplished something by dating someone younger.
Speaker 2:I don't, I feel Well, no, I don't think you're supposed to accomplish something, but like I don't feel, like I just hate talking about the number like how many years apart we are.
Speaker 1:Like I just hate talking about the number like how many years apart we are. Like I just like to say like she's younger, I'm older.
Speaker 2:Okay, it's a thing. See, here's my thing. My thing is, if you're dating somebody who is younger or older than you, I think a I really truly believe age is just a number, depending on the age gap and where you are in life. So if you're somebody who's in your 20s and you're dating somebody who's in their 30s or 40s, you're going to feel that difference, that age difference. If you're somebody who's in their 40s and this person's in their 30s, then you're not really going to feel the age difference so much. Or 40s and 50s, you're not going to feel the age difference so much.
Speaker 2:I think once you start getting older, the age gap doesn't seem as prominent in my opinion yeah, once you get older, though, right, but when you're in your 20s or early 30s, that's like the most pivotal time in your life, right, and that, I think, is a huge age difference between you and somebody who's older, I mean even five years is a big difference, let alone 10 or 13 or more.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I mean, that's how it was and I feel like in certain areas we did feel that you know we definitely did feel that, and there are times where she was probably like damn, I was fucking boring, because little did she know how wild I actually was.
Speaker 2:But see, I never thought of you as boring. Even now I'm not boring, right? No, you're not boring.
Speaker 1:I'm boring. You're not boring, I'm not boring at all. Maybe I was just tired earlier than she was, you know. But no, but I mean this is just my assumption on what I think that she thought. But I do know that we both we felt the age difference in certain scenarios, Like sometimes I'm like, hey, I don't think like this is a good idea, and she'd be like I'm gonna do what I want, Like you know Fern's, like I'm gonna do what I want, yeah but I think that's also because you have the experience that she doesn't have and the maturity that she doesn't quite have yet.
Speaker 2:Like, though, I will say, fern has been through a lot, and she's definitely had to grow up very quickly, so I can see why you would feel a connection towards somebody who is so much younger, but I personally, like, I'm into older women. So you are, you're the Puma, I'm the puma. Yes, I'm into older women, so you like older women.
Speaker 2:Why do you feel like you like older women, though I've always dated older, whether it's a year to, I don't know, six, eight, I think. Eight's probably the oldest. I've gone eight or nine years, I don't know. I've just always been attracted to more mature women. I think for me also because I'm an old soul and I'm not the young in, I'm not the one who's even. When I was young I wasn't the one that was at the club partying it up and being wild and getting insane.
Speaker 2:I mean, yes, I had my moment, but literally till I was like 24 and then it all just ended. So for me I I think I've always just connected with older people, like I feel like I'm an old soul, like for me, 9 pm being in bed watching TV is my jam. Do you think that had?
Speaker 1:to do with the fact that you have siblings. There's such a huge age gap that growing up it wasn't like they were taking you out and partying.
Speaker 2:No, but I mean they were taking me out and partying. No, but I mean they were taking me out, but no, because my sister, tati she is tatiana is way, way younger than I am in a lot of ways. Like she, I'm the one who's taking her and pulling her out of the nightclubs.
Speaker 2:I want to go to the nightclub I'm the one that's like we gotta go and she's in her 50s, you know like we gotta go. It's time to go. I'm, it's bedtime for me, so I don't think. That's why I think, and if you, I mean, you knew my mom, but my mom was she passed at 66. Tomorrow's her birthday, actually. She would have been 78. And I guarantee you that woman would have been partying just as much as she was at 66, at 78. And I would have been with her there 66, at 78.
Speaker 2:And I would have been with her there. To me it's like there is no age where I feel like you have to go. Oh, it's time to reel it in, because I'm an old lady now, as somebody who was raised by obviously older sisters and my mother was older when she had me. I don't know, maybe it's like a mommy issue thing, I have no idea, but I like older women. I mean, don't get me wrong, I don't know, maybe it's like a mommy issue thing, I have no idea, but I like older women. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not going to be out there dating like an 80 something year old lady, I mean when I'm 40.
Speaker 2:But yeah, you know, I mean, I don't discriminate. I tend to find older women more attractive. I tend to be attracted to them not only just physically but mentally and emotionally. So for me, yeah, I tend to like older women. A lot of times people don't realize that the person who is the older one tends to be the more childish one and the one that is the younger one tends to be the more mature one sometimes that is so rude to say.
Speaker 1:I'm just saying I thought you were going to say like so rude to say. I'm just saying I thought you were going to say like the older one tends to be the more outgoing and fun one. No, it is. Took a left and said childish. It is but sometimes she can be a little childish. Well, let me be. I have one life to live and I just love to have a good time, and if the music is good listen, count me in.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you and my sister will be dancing the night away.
Speaker 1:I'm here, fern, and I will be like it's time to go yeah, she'll leave, or yeah, you'll kick me out, she'll leave.
Speaker 2:But me 9 pm. Everybody's got to go.
Speaker 1:I know, boo, I know it's all right. It's all right. You know what? At least you stick to your structure. I'm honest, you know you stick to your structure.
Speaker 2:I'm honest, can't be mad at that you little bull, you can't be mad at that, can't be mad. Nope, I like what I like. I'm all about the party until I'm not that I know.
Speaker 1:And then y'all got to get the fuck out.
Speaker 2:I hope we can recreate your 40th birthday again one day, because that was a lot. That was the fun, oh, that was so much fun that that I remember okay. But I don't like this whole like oh, the fun side of you. I feel like I'm fun regardless whether I'm out there having fun or I am not having.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'll say this you have become more fun as the years have gone by, but there there was a period of time where, no, you were not, you were not fun. I'm like Soli, come, let's take a shot. I'm not taking a shot, I'm not doing that.
Speaker 2:Oh, because I just wasn't like, I wasn't in it.
Speaker 1:Right before we shot this, you said you wanted a shot.
Speaker 2:Well, because I felt like I needed to, you know, loosen up. You know it's been a tense time.
Speaker 1:A tense time, yeah, to say the least. For numerous reasons To say the least, yeah, but here we are. Okay, so now that we've established who the cougars are and who the pumas are although I wish there was like another name and it wasn't like pumas- Like couldn't it be cheetahs?
Speaker 2:I have a feeling a cheetah is something we don't even know. Oh really because, what about jack? We are, we are a little bit on the outdated side, so there are things that we don't know about well like this whole hybrid thing. Shut the fuck up with that shit uh, hybrid the hybrid there's like a whole bunch of other terms that I'm not aware of and a lot of labels that I don't know about.
Speaker 1:So I I'm not conforming to this hybrid bullshit.
Speaker 2:So I don't want to speak on that All right.
Speaker 1:Well, fine Pumas cougars.
Speaker 2:A cheetah. If you know what a cheetah is, let us know A cheetah she's a cheetah. She's a cheetah.
Speaker 1:Oh, she's a cheetah. I'm reformed, I'm a reformed cheetah.
Speaker 2:Cheetah, fuck oh no, have you ever dated an older woman?
Speaker 1:No, I don't think so. No, I've always been the same age, fernanda's, the only exception to the rule.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah, fernanda's the golden one.
Speaker 2:The golden one.
Speaker 1:The golden goose, the golden puma. Yeah, I hate that. I don't like that animal for her because you know what? I keep associating it with the shoe I'm having a hard time? No, it's not the shoe. I'm having a hard time.
Speaker 2:I know it's not the shoe, but it's like when I think of a puma, I'm thinking of pumas and I don't like pumas. Pumas are actually like.
Speaker 1:I think they're like majestic animals or something. There's like a whole thing about pumas. Oh, I'm going to go home and open my encyclopedia and read about pumas.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you should. You're going to realize how much they have in common there, the Pumas and your Puma.
Speaker 1:Ferns. All right, now I'm really going to look up Pumas.
Speaker 2:I really wonder why they call them Cougars and Pumas though.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because do.
Speaker 2:Cougars just like manhandle the young. I don't know, but I don't mind being manhandled by a Cougar.
Speaker 1:Okay, save that we have a whole sex episode coming out. Today's not the day I didn't drink anything.
Speaker 2:We didn't drink anything, not even enough. We just didn't drink anything. I didn't drink anything.
Speaker 1:I'm fresh from Miami. I'm detoxing. You are. You are fresh. How was Miami? It was wonderful. I love it. Eyes on the golden puma that I have Good job. You were setting me up. She probably told you to ask me some shit like that. No, but Miami was great. I'm happy to be back, but it was great.
Speaker 2:All right, I think we're going to wrap it up here with the cougars and pumas and we're going to call it an episode. Call it an episode.
Speaker 1:Call it an episode.
Speaker 2:And we will catch you guys on the next one. Thank you so much for listening or watching. Please, please, please, subscribe. If you're not subscribed to our YouTube channel, hit that like. Also, leave us a rating. Yes, please. We greatly appreciate it Please.
Speaker 2:Five stars. And, yeah, send us your questions and we will try to answer them, or topics that you guys want to hear us talk about, because we are definitely trying to get more topics that might interest you guys. I know we did a post, but please, like, let us know, send us an email, send us a text message, send us a pigeon, whatever the hell you want to send us. Let us know. We are open, open, open. We'll catch you guys on the next one. Thank you so much for listening. Later, boos, bye, boos.
